What does it mean to be a friend?


Today I went to the DC Caribbean Carnival. At some point a boy asked me to dance and I obliged. Then he continued to follow me and act as if I was his possession. I was having a difficult time keeping him away after a while. My friend noticed this and stuck up for me and tried to help me out of the situation. She yelled at him and asked him to leave me alone.

The whole Carnival was pretty lackluster until we went to a cookout near by. We met up with some male friends of mine I had not seen in a very long time. We had a lot of fun and met some fun people.

Afterwards my friend and I walked back to the home of one male friend. We get there and I realized how tired I was. He gets us some water and I just chill on the couch.

My friend wanted a tour of the house and goes upstairs with my male friend for that purpose. I just chill on the couch talking to my other male friend. She comes back downstairs after a while and sits on the couch again. I don't notice anything different about her demeanor. Then my male friend comes down later.

Another two friends show up and they chat for just a little too long. So my friend taps me and says she wants to go. I agree as I am getting tired. My male friend had previously said he would take us home. So I alerted him that we wanted to go.

We go outside and she says to me "something bad happened." I asked her what and she doesn't say. She says she is going to walk home. We were pretty far from home and her walking alone in the dark or the two of us walking didn't seem like a reasonable option. Besides I have no idea why she's brining up the walking option. So I said "well I'll just have him drop you off first." I was a little confused and it didn't occur to me to take an alternate form of transportation home since she was visibly hesitating on the idea of my friend taking her home. The whole thing caught me off guard. I was starting to sense there was a problem that I wasn't aware of. However, it doesn't occur to me how uncomfortable she may feel since I have no idea what is going on. I was just very confused.

We drive her home and she gets out of the car. I ask her to call me tomorrow. We drive a couple of blocks and my male friend says, "Your friend has an attitude." I asked him what happened and he doesn't answer because his boy was in the car. As a woman, I interpreted his statement to mean, "Fuck her for rejecting my advance."

That's when it clicks. Something did happen, between the two of them. Before they went upstairs everything is all buddy buddy. When it comes to the car ride home she doesn't want to go and he's saying she has an attitude. The last 5 hours everything is all good now she has an attitude? What did you do to make her react this way? I let you out of my sight and you may have acted like less than a gentleman towards my friend?

Something happened between them and I don't know what it is. I would never knowingly put a friend in danger or an uncomfortable situation. I also trusted the male friend to respect my friends. I'm not sure if he just tried to holla or if it was more than that. It had to be more than that now that I can look back at the situation. She let her guard down because she was supposed to be around a people I trust.

I left her a voicemail and asked her to call me. She didn't call back. I've known her for about 4 months and she was moving from being an acquaintance to a friend. I would never knowingly put her in harms way. Now I think I may have compromised a new friendship. She will never want to meet anyone I know again. Earlier in the day when I was in harms way she really helped me out. When she was in harms way I didn't do the same for her. I unknowingly forced her to stay in the situation even if it was only for 5 minutes more. For her perspective it might look like I ignored her feelings although it was more so that I didn't have enough information to make a proper decision.

As I write this I keep thinking about what I could have done differently. I really don't think I could have done anything since I wasn't there when the incident happened nor was I fully aware of the situation. I'm still not aware of what happened. However, I should have been more sensitive to her hesitation to be around my friend.

In general I am a lot more savvy when my girlfriends are in uncomfortable situations when we are around strangers. Since I was with someone I trusted I wasn't looking out for the same clues. There was nothing to indicate that I should.

I hope she calls me so that I can get the full story and take action.

As for my male friend I am trying to wait and hear her side of the story. However, she may never call me again. Even though I have known this guy for years I wouldn't just take his side. He apparently did something my friend didn't like and that needs to be taken care of. I'm not really interested in his side of the story or hanging out with him for quite sometime. He damaged my reputation and broke my trust and I don't appreciate that.

I'll feel all fucked up and will continue to until I can get this matter resolved. Obviously none of this is my fault but I still feel bad about it. It's hard enough to make friends as an adult without other niggas fucking it up for you.

I called her again and left an apology message stating that I was very sorry for whatever happened since I don't know any of the story. I think leaving an apology voicemail was wack but I felt I couldn't let 24hrs go bye without saying what I needed to say. That's all I can do for now and it keep moving on.

Cheer me up or give me a dose of reality in the comment.

Did you know this blog was relevant to current events?

Okay maybe I should have heard of Sidamo:
Starbucks
New Cafe in DC

How Not to Holla:

Washington City Paper

Ranch Be Gone

With the oppressive heat we've been experiencing in the metro area, who wants to eat a hot meal? We are fully into salad season. I'm excited and ready to embrace it.

However, my food snob radar has been going off lately. I have been really sensitive to people ordering ranch as their dressing of choice. I feel like there are many dressings that will make your lettuce stand to its feet. Especially as adults, we should expand our palettes so we can enjoy life that much more. So today I offer to you a recipe, Aisha's Chinese chicken salad.

Salad

1 chicken breast chopped (grilled or pan fried)
chinese cabbage chopped (tough stalks removed)
cilantro chopped (or other fresh herb)
slivered Almonds
1 Can mandarin oranges


Homemade Dressing

combine the following in a bowl with a sealed top

Juice of 1 Lime
3 TBSP Sesame Oil (or olive oil)
1TBSP Chinese mustard (or Dijon)
1TBSP Honey
Rice Vinegar (or white or champagne vinegar)

Shake Well. Pour on salad.


They say "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime." In my next entry I will explain the salad dressing making basics so you can get creative.

No Taxation Without Representation

Living in DC you pay more "state" taxes than almost every other state in the country. If I moved to VA or MD I could would effectively get a 3% pay raise. I pay more and get less. Eleanor Holmes Norton screams her heart out on the house floor all for naught.

If I'm not going to get all the benefits I am entitled to as a citizen of the United States let me make sure I get all I can for my 9%.

1. Swiming Lessons
They are free to district residents. I will be in the 2008 Olympics best believe.

2. Library
I work 2 blocks from the main library and from Barnes and Noble. Well BN say goodbye to my money. I'm not paying sales tax to buy books anymore.

3. Street Festivals
If the city sponsors it I shall be there.

4. Department of Public Works
Potholes, Graffiti and Trash. They will get a call from me post haste.

5. I will research any all other free city services. It's my right.

If you know of any free things the city offers please let me know. Let's get all we can from this crummy government.

Allow me to get my groupie on for a moment. Ladies I thought I would share this with you.



(I did not film this nor am I the person screaming)

I've been working on being less negative but watching the Detroit vs. Cavs I just couldn't. This isn't about the game being boring. This isn't about the them stopping the game for 21 minutes while they try and fix the shot clock. This is about Craig Sager. Unfortunately I can't find a picture that does justice to how terrible his suit, tie, shirt, and toupee were. This is the best picture I could find. Here is some footage :




****geez what did blogger do to my orignal posting...sorry for the previous madness.

Literary Genius


My senior year of high school I nearly failed English. My teacher wasn't very effective when it came to helping me with my technical difficulties. I have always been a master orator but writing is something I will always have to work on. I have great ideas but they don't translate well on paper. To make matters worse I was also a very slow reader, I ponder on every single word. I'm not sure where that orginated given that I started reading at 3 yrs old and spent my entire summers in the library.

This particular teacher, whose name I cannot currently recall, was very boring and didn't make AP English palatable in anyway. After I figured out I might not pass I just started sleeping in my car during her class and I would just do the assignments on my own.

Towards the end of the semester she assigned Richard Wright's "Native Sun" I read most of it but it is a pretty long novel and there just wasn't enough time to read it that week.

I had to write a paper on it and since I didn't finish reading it I just made it up. At the time I didn't know all that had befallen Bigger Thomas. If I had access to the internet I could have looked like a literary genius. The teacher was well aware that I didn't finish the book and gave me a D. I didn't care because she was easily the worst teacher I ever had.

Since then I have read almost all of Richard Wright's work, a literary genius. A few years ago I donated all my books by black authors to a high school here in DC. It was hard to give them up but I hoped that a student with an ineffective English teacher might pick up his work. Several times since then I have thought out repurchasing all of Mr. Wrights works. However, I opt for a contemporary work everytime.

In Oregon I found myself in a used bookstore as I was browsing I ran across a hardback copy of both Black Boy and Native Sun. I believe they were both original pressings. It felt good to have them both in my possession again. I'm thankful that I didn't let one person stop me from discovering great literature. I'm hopeful that some student in Anacostia high school will discover the same.

This morning I was up really early. As I flipped through the channels I noticed that one of my favorite bands, Ozomatli was performing. I watched the last of their concert and waited to see who was up next. Unfortunately the next person performing was Macy Gray. She is one of those singers I just don't get. If her life depended on singing on pitch she'd surely be at the pearly gates speaking to God himself.

I didn't change the channel as I wanted to see if I could finally understand. I now know that she is actually a great songwriter if she writes those songs. Also her band did a great job of surrounding her with beats and melodies to sing a long to. The other highlight was Kameelah Williams ,formerly the lead singer of 702, was one of her backup singers. If I was Ms. Williams I would be extremely annoyed that I had to sing back up for this hack. Ms. Williams got a few solo moments and she really stole the show. Her vocals are impeccable and I would welcome hearing more from her.

Macy does have a few strengths. She knows where to find good talent. She is the manager for Sunshine Anderson who I hear is coming out with a new album this fall. I hope she will be helping Kameelah Williams go solo as well. Also she's a decent actress. I enjoyed her roles in Training Day and Lackawanna Blues. I would prefer that she stick to artist management and acting where she really excels. I tend to like things that no one else likes and Macy's music seems rather unlikeable. Usually I can find something beautiful if I look hard enough. Not so. However, many people really enjoy her music and if it moves them I can't take that away.

What do you call your hairstyle?

It doesn't have a name, afro, naturally curly I guess.

Well you look Sidamo, girls from Sidamo wear their hair like that.

I never heard of it.

You've never been to Starbucks?

I don't go there often.

You boycotting?

No. I just don't really drink coffee.

Well if you do go try Sidamo. Since you look Sidamo I am sure you will like it.

Happy Mothers Day

It is one of the hardest days of the year for me. I won't sit here and make yall sad. At the end of it all I use this day to remember that she was a survivor and I am thankful that I was given 22 extra years to have her in my life.


So call her, see her, love her, cherish her.

Baron Davis....there is nothing more to say than, Go South Central! This is like watching Akeelah and the Bee, except it's the NBA finals.

I'm very surprised that I am able to post this blog. I am currently in Pendleton, Oregon. Population 16,000; Black population 200. I saw only two black people in my stay. Right now I am sitting in the smallest airport I have ever been in. Yesterday I would have told you that the Pasco, WA airport was the smallest airport I have visited but no Pendleton, Orgeon takes. It has only one airline Horizon and one rental car company Hertz. Currently I seem to be the only passenger for my flight that leaves in about an hour. I knew there wouldn't be a security line but I didn't think that security would be closed until twenty minutes before the flight.

I had about three hours to kill before my flight so I attempted to do something cultural. They have a large Native American population and there is this tour of an underground city they built way back when. I got there at 3:30pm and the last tour had already left. Then I tried to walk over to their museum but it was closing in 30 mins and I wasn't giving up six dollars for 30 mins. So then I just drove around a bunch. I started to stop at the public library but I kept driving and found Walmart. I have never been so happy to see Walmart before. I thought for sure I could kill an hour just browsing. Despite being a Walmart supercenter, the women's clothing section was itty bitty. I then tried the book section but the selection of Sudoku books left a lot to be desired. I was getting kind of hungry but I knew there had to be a local place I could eat. I didn't want to eat at Chu Man Fu Chinese or Taco Bell. So drove around downtown some more when I spotted Main Street. This Main Street was just like you see in the movies. Small stores and what was probably a really thriving area before the advent of Walmart. I then spot Great Pacific Wine and Beer and decide to stop and get a bite to eat. It was a neat little cafe that served pizza, sandwiches and of course wine and beer. Being on the west coast you can get great avacado so I opted for a sandwich with avocado. You also had a choice to get mayo or a dijon yogurt sauce instead. I had never heard of that kind of sauce but anything has to be better than mayo and it was. The sandwhich was very good and they had an excellent wine selection. You could tell it was a place where the more affluent locals hung out. Probably the professors of the local college.

I drove a little further down main street and I discovered JCPenney. I couldn't believe they actually had a department store. Well not the way we think of it. It was super tiny but it was interesting that they actually had it. I was starting to think the only place to buy clothing was walmart.

I'm at the airport on my way to Medford Oregon. I opened my computer to do some work and to my astonishment they have free wireless internet. Yay Pendleton. It has allowed me to write this nice entry. I need to do this more often because I have lots of adventures but before I write one I'm on to the next. I'm going to try to pen something on the food I have eaten in the last two weeks.

"I'm friends with all my exes"
"Well me, I'm not. I don't speak to them and I have no idea where they are"

Thanks to the internet specifically, Myspace, I have gotten back in touch with two people I dated over ten years ago. It all started with a high school friend sending me a message. This guy just happened to look extremely similar to the guy that I dated most of high school. That prompted me to look him up on myspace. I had completely lost his whereabouts and our high school has seemed to stop having reunions. Since he had a rather unique last name, I thought it would be easy to find him. Low and behold there he is. I now know that he is married to what appears to be, for the purposes of this tale, the other girl. It was kind of neat to see where he ended as I often wondered what happened. I probably wouldn't really like Wu-Tang or Outkast if he didn't introduce me to them. We started dating when I was 13 and broke up for the final time when I was 17. That's an enternity in high school years. There were no real hard feelings way back then. He doesn't know this but a lot of who I am today is a result of that relationship.

This whole interaction led me re-tally the score in one particular realm of life. As I have mention before in this blog, when my relationship ends the dude gets married within 6 months. Well I had no idea what happened to him therefore he was the only wildcard. He got married after me too. The girl he married was one of those uber nice girls so I had a feeling that he would get back together with her way back then. That was just an inkling I had in 1996. It was right but I didn't extrapolate that to marriage because who gets married to someone they met in highschool? Well he did! However I don't know the time frame in which they got married. It doesn't matter because I'm still counting this one in my record.

Now just yesterday I get a message from an ex that I had not thought about in a very long time. Actually he came up during thanksgiving because B also has a friend who tells people he played sports at the university of spoiled children. Total bullshit from both of them. Yhey never even applied to the university or any university for that matter. I spoke of him and then his memory left my mind. The message said "Let's see if you can figure out who this is. It is the person who gave you the nickname Ishari." It's been about 10 years since he blessed me with that nickname, a combination of my first and middle names. To this day a few people still call me that. It's a part of my email and my aim name. Despite having that name stuck to me forever, he rarely comes to mind. So we are doing the requiste small talk but I wonder what made him look me up. We broke up on very strange terms and barely spoke after that.

I thought he started the trend "leave Aisha and quickly marry" but apparently he was the second. Since we were neighbors, a guy who lived on his street told my sister that he was married. I was shocked and confused at the time. I've come to terms now with the scenario because it's so familiar now. I've had a bad habit of getting back together with my exes. So I've surmised that have to get married or the toxic relationship will come back to life. Sounds good right?

This whole thing has made me think about how much I've grown up. In some ways I'm the same but I'm so much wiser and i have a lot more integrity. There is a link to my blog on my myspace so they just might be lurkin. So if you are reading this, hi guys.

I spent the past week in Louisiana on work related business but none of it would take me to New Orleans. I decided it was worth it stay an extra 36 hours to go to Jazzfest and to see New Orleans for myself. My time in New Orleans was brief but there was no way I was leaving with out seeing the Katrina damage for myself. At happy hour last week, a woman named Kate recommended that I go on the “Katrina Tour”. I was shocked that a tour company would have something like this. She assured me that it was not exploitive at all and that it had a profound impact on her. Reluctantly I paid my $35 because I wasn’t sure if it was safe enough for me to try and drive around by myself. The media will tell you it’s the “Wild Wild South” but I didn’t want to attempt to prove them wrong.

I booked the tour and it would be the last thing I would do before I left town. Earlier that morning as I was driving from my appointment I ran into some homes with significant damage. The closer I got to Lake Ponchatrain the more damage I observed. Street signs at odd angles from wind damage. The stores that were open had mylar banners indicating so; if you drove too quickly you would think they were out of business. There was a house that looked like no one had touched it in two years which was probably true. The mold covered the entire facade and the grass untouched. The windows were blown out so I pulled over and peaked in. The furniture was strewn all over and you could see the extensive water damage on everything in sight. It didn’t appear that the family who previously inhabited the dwelling had returned to retrieve anything. Actually, there was nothing to retrieve. An entire history lost to the storm surge and to the incompetence of our government for the last 30 years.

On every block there were several homes just like this one. The symbols from the rescuers still graffiti home after home. As I viewed the numerous symbols I tried to remember what it meant. The storm hit on 8-29 and every home was dated with somewhere between 9-14 and 9-24. Their homes weren’t checked for at least 15 days after the storm. Fortunately the number on the bottom on the X was always 0. Which means they did not find anybody dead in that particular home. They all escaped, fortunately.

The news has focused on the lower 9th ward, where there was total devastation and where many of the stranded poor black residents resided. I went through every part of town, rich, poor, large homes, small homes. Every one of them with a rescue squad symbol and a waterline. Each home featured a gray, brown or rust colored line that told the story. The waterline, the point where the flood water settled ranged from 2 feet to about 16 feet. This doesn’t include the 20 to 26 foot surge. Many one story homes had the rescue symbol on the roof indicating that when the home was checked the water was so high they probably checked it by boat. I passed by many two story homes with their first floors engulfed with quickly rising water.

Then there were the holes in the roofs, the attempts to save themselves from the rapidly rising water only to be me stuck in 100 degree without food, water, or a radio to find out what is going on. Even though the French Quarter survived how can you stay in a town with no electricity, no potable water, no police force?

Many people are back in town now. For every home you see untouched, you see at least one with a trailer in front. I even found a block where every home had a trailer in front. You also see numerous “Katrina Villages”, parking lots that have been turned into trailer parks. The trailers are very small, although we joke about them, they could at least give them a double wide. You also see the little red flags marking spaces where trailers are to come but haven’t arrived yet, two years later.

Finally there was light at the end of the tunnel. After passing by Fats Domino’s house we turned the corner to see two blocks of bright pastel rebuilt houses. These houses were a part of Musicians Village. Habitat for Humanity and Harry Connick Jr. started a project where they are building houses for displaced musicians. They get interest free loans and they must put 350 hours of sweat equity into the home. We rounded another corner and there was a family on the porch. They waved and clapped and they were happy to see the tourbus. Their house was in the middle of renovations but I saw three generations of New Orleanians enjoying a nice day in April. This was the end of the tour and I had slipped into a depression. Seeing those people happy with what they had brought tears to my eyes.

My camera battery died early during the tour so the links represent some of the areas where houses are still standing. In many places, whole neighborhoods have been lost. It was probably for the best because I stopped trying to get the best shot and just took it all in.

We rode around for 3 hours and I have no idea how many miles we covered but we covered many. The area impacted was much bigger than I could have ever imagined. I have heard many people talk about how the recovery is going slow. Now that I see that it’s much bigger than what we see on TV, I can’t see how they can go any faster. With so many people not returning, no insurance money for homeownwers to rebuild and no help for displacd renters I understand why it is the way it is. Almost every home in the city has some damage. New Orleans is much bigger than DC but if every home in DC was destroyed I can’t see it all being rebuilt that fast given that there isn’t any precedent for the situation. We didn't have a plan. Whatever plan they did come up with will not make everyone happy because there are always winners and losers. I want to go back soon. One to do more tourist things and volunteer. Everyone needs to see it for themselves because there is no way to understand the magnitude of what happened the day the leeves broke.

Girl Interupted:Blog Neglected

For the next month, as well as last month, my travel schedule is crazy. Every other week I am out of town on work related business. There are several things I want to write about but I just can't find the time to do it. I'm writing this just to do although there are stories to tell and things ponder. I'll see you all next week.

As many of you know, I spend a fair amount of time perusing the web. Today everyone is talking about the VA Tech incident. As with everything people move away from the actually facts to the policital and social aspects. So today some posed the question "Are Asians embarrassed?". The point the person was trying to make is that black people have internalized so much racism that when things like this happen we secrectly hope and pray the person isn't black. We really worry how the actions of one person effects the rest of us. I completely agree with that point.

However, where it went astray for me is that have several close relationships with Asian people and I know that their communtiy is devasted as well. Now Asians don't secretly pray "it won't be them" because racist executives don't even portray them in the media, negatively or positively. I think many asian people will be embarassed because "we don't do that sort of thing." They are equally concerned about their image as are Black people. I can't tell you how so many of my Asian friends haven't lived their dreams because they are afraid of what the extended family will think of them. I know these aren't isolated incidents, Berkeley is like 55% Asian and my highschool was like 40% Asian.

While I get the point the person was trying to make and I thank him for making it, the behavior he was referencing is found

The official "How not to holla" blog....

http://dontbesilent3.blogspot.com/

People think I make this shit up. Street harrassment is so real in DC. I make light of it on this blog but it's a serious problem.

The Best of DC

A friend of a friend does restaurant reviews for dcist.com and I am so jealous. So right here, right now I'll stop being jealous and take a turn at it myself.

Last night after a marathon meeting for one of my community endeavors we ventured out to the U Street corridor for a cheap but satisfying meal. We eventually settled on Polly's Cafe. I haven't been to Polly's in about two years and I didn't remember being moved by anything other than the apple crisp.

Polly's is a very small restaurant in the basement of a brownstone and it doesn't seat very many people. When we arrived we were cramped at a table that was oddly placed in the middle of the floor where nearly everyone brushed me as they walked by. It was also very dark as I could barely read the menu. Myself and my companion settled on ordering the turkey burgers with a side of spicy coleslaw. In addition, I ordered a glass of sangria to help me wind down.

The sprite my friend ordered was more like seltzer water. My sangria was just okay but I wasn't expecting much from a place that probably more focused on beer. Our turkey burgers came and I was surprised by their size. The burgers were somewhere between 1/3 and 1/2 pound with accompaniments so large I would think they were genetically modified. The burger itself was very well seasoned and not dry as turkey burgers tend to be. The spicy slaw was indeed spicy almost too spicy but it was a unique take on a dish that I usually don't care for.

I don't usually have favorites because it's hard for me to give that honor to anyone. However, I think Polly's has the best turkey burger in DC. The only downside is that Polly's is cash only and not too many people carry cash these days. It feels very much like a neighborhood place unlike many of the newer establishments that are in the area and prices aren't that bad either.

Comment Comment Comment

I've been on a businesstrip/vacation for the past week. Apparently I missed when Don Imus insulted the Rutgers women's basketball team. As I was waiting around in the Detroit airport, FoxNews informed me that he refered to the team as "nappy headed hoes." I was outraged at his comment and more than an apology was needed.

However, I feel conflicted. Recently Ludacris released the song "Runaway Love" and I everytime I hear it I think "I really wish he would go back to bitches and hoes." Don Imus didn't just pull the phrase out of his ass...he's heard it somewhere. Probably from Ludacris. I'm not blaming hip hop but... Don Imus is dead wrong but let's put it in context.

Boundaries

So today was going great. I got my hair did. I went to lunch with my father and talked to my uncle for a few minutes. Then I went inside with my father to try to ask him some questions about his life since I am trying to write his biography. Well out of no where he wants to talk about his love life. So for 45 minutes he tells me about all the trials and tribulations of his life. He talks about the ladyfriend he really loves, the one who needs validation by meeting me and another one with issues. For 30 of the 45 minutes he was digging around for some piece of paper to show me. So after a while I asked him what he was looking for and he told me it was a letter he wrote her on valentine's day. I told him to stop looking for it . I sat on the couch and I damn near cried because I was incredicably uncomfortable with him telling me about his love life. There are boundaries that I need to maintain with him. You can't wait until I am 28 years old and all of the sudden you want to talk about relationship yours or mine. I didn't reallly talk to my mother about these things either. So at about minute 45 he switches gears and starts to tell him what love is. He does this by asking me questions about Brent. I pretendend they were rhetorical and didn't answer anything. At about minute 48 when I really thought I was going to start crying because I wanted him to stop. I just said, "you are belaboring" the point. Then I made an excuse and said I needed to leave.

I havent seen my dad in 6 months and I hated to end my day long visit on this note not knowing when I would see him again. For my sanity I needed to leave the situation. I think I'll call him right now and apologize for my abrupt departure.

Welcome to the Yay!

The plane ride from Baltimore to Oakland was long and horrid. I got a nonstop for convenience on southwest because every other flight had a connection. After today, I really think I might actually be a fan of the short layover. You get to stretch and get something to eat. Also if you have a 2 year old kicking your seat and smelling like shit, you get a chance to have at least half your flight go better.

I'm in my hotel in Oakland, CA waiting for my coworker to arrive. I wanted to leave and go to the Burrito Shop since I ate there at least once a week when I was going to school. I thought it wouldn't be wise decision since she would be arriving soon and we still need finish up a few loose ends before the morning. An hour later and she still hasn't arrived. I doubt I will get to satisfy my burrito craving so I am kinda upset. However, I found Top Dog. Top Dog is where I discovered the chicken apple sausage nearly a decade ago. At the time I didn't eat beef or pork so being apple to eat chicken sausages was great (yes i know the casing was pork). I got a Lemon Chicken today which was my second favorite sausage. They grill them just right and put them on this delicious bread. I haven't been back in Oakland for at least 5 years and I am kind of sad that I will only be here for 24 hrs.

I was on the plane trying to figure out what my favorite bay area restaurant was. I don't know if I have one since during college you can't really afford to eat well. I remember eating lots of burritos, crepes, Thai, pizza and "smart fries".



Operation Stunna Shades continues

I forgot to put my shades on when I left the plane which had disastrous consequences. I was approached by a 65 year man who wanted to chat. We talked about DC because his son went to Howard Law and worked on the hill. Innocent enough I thought. Then he started hitting on me. He had a cane and his eyes looked hella glossy like he just smoked a blunt or something. He was completely invading my space. However, none of this would have ever happened if I had of remembered to put my glasses on.

Operation Stunna Shades

This week I have been trying an experiment. I bought some sunglasses that are more glamourous than I am. They aren't expensive but they have that star quality eventhough I purchased them in Rocky Mount, NC. They have been nicknamed my "Stunna Shades". Don't know what a stunna is...well think about David Blaine the stunt artist. Why does he do all those crazy things? Just to show off. So for this spring and summer i'm a Stunna and "i'm bout to show off".

I've been trying to reduce the number of people who feel it is okay to randomly talk to me. First I tried headphones but my hair is so big they never realize that I have headphones on. I don't like people thinking I really can't hear them because that's how people get attacked and purses stolen.

This week I started Operation "Stunna Shades". I'm testing the hypothesis that wearing these sunglasses makes me look unaproachable and less men will aproach me. It's Wednesday and the only thing that has happened is a hiss which was ignored because when you have Stunna Shades it means you can't hear it. Also the first day I didn't wear them in the metro but I noticed that other women do. So I started wearing them in the metro but it feels weird because it's kind of dark down there and they aren't needed to block the sun anymore. However, If I want to maximize the effect of Operation Stunna Shades I have to wear them whenever I am outside my home which includes the metro. Yesterday I even read my Metro free paper with the Stunna Shades on. However, the point of the Stunna Shades is make people think that you have lost all your senses as soon as the glasses go on. So I guess I can't read on the train or it negates the point of my operation. I'm going to continue to keep track of this especially as the big, bulky, winter clothing comes off.

Since Operation Stunna Shades is going so well I don't have a "How not holla." Sadly, something much worse happened today. I went to work pretty late today so there were plenty of seats on the metro. I rarely sit down because I only go two stops. I sat down today and a short porty man in his signature red and black TGIF friday uniform moves towards the pole near me. There were plenty of other places to stand or sit but he chose to stand right in front of me. I previously had been staring at the floor but when he got close I rose my head up to eye level. At eye level, I noticed that he was tenting, he had a hard on. At that moment I was secretly hoping that my Stunna Shades truly did turn off all my senses

Finally I have returned...

I wrote a couple of posts that disappeared into the blogger graveyard. I'm sure they were both funny, witty and fabulous but I have no idea what they were. Only thing I really remember is the "How not to holla" that happened to me two weeks ago. In summary I was told "I'm so happy to be able to stand next to you."

Now for the more current events! I am working with a group on the HIV/AIDS epidemic in DC. Today we held a discussion group about social factors that lead to HIV. There was this group of men from a community based organization there. A few of them were in my group and we had a lively discussion. One in particular J had the Gary Dourdan look. His arms were very muscular and they accented his tattoo just right. So after the formal discussion I asked them where they were from. They were all currently in a drug treatment program. *record scratch*.

I know this is pretty ignorant of me but I completely buy into the stereotype about drug users who have problems serious enough to warrant enrolling into a program. I'm basically reminded the drooling crack head who tried to kiss me 4 years ago. There were no outward signs that they were in drug treatment program and I would have never figured out they were former users if I hadn't asked. All the points they were making were on point and I learned a few things about drug and gun policy from them.

So after that knowledge I looked at J differently. I shouldn't have been looking that hard to be begin with. I started looking at his arms to see if there were track marks. I can get a little out of control with my stereotypes. As he was leaving he reminded me that his phone number was on his sign in sheet. I giggled to myself.

I needed the reminder about not judging a book by its cover as this is something I am really struggling with right now. I'm trying to make more authentic contact with people who aren't like me. I think I can learn a lot and get over some of the "isms" I hold.

Blogger ate my last two post. So I'll be back with something after this business trip. Toodles!

Today in Sports

I just returned from the Wizards vs. Warriors game. My old boss from two years ago called me to let me know that if I was available that a friend and I could join him in his company's box. Being new to Washington, I took the chance to go and see my new favorite team live. I wasn't going to pass it up. I called a few of my guy friends that I knew were sports fans but they weren't available. Then I remembered that G was from Oakland and of course he would be down to see the Warriors.

Sitting in the box was great. Someone had already set it out with hotdogs, salad, chips and chicken finger. Well that's really not settin' out but you know, free is free! It was unfortunate that this was my vegetarian week and I got side tracked already by the chicken fingers. Then "The Giant", 7 ft 7in, Gheorghe Muresan stopped by to hang with us for a second. I got to catch up with G and J and that was great. You know how I like to talk.

Just when we thought the game is over with just .1 seconds and down three points the wizards draw a foul. It was a pretty uneventful game but we now had a chance to tie the game. Then the coach for the Warriors said something that caused a technical. With this turn of events Agent Zero was able to come through in the clutch to shoot 3 free throws to win the game. The crowd went wild! In other news my boo boo got a couple of fouls in the first five minutes so he wasn't really in the game too much.

Now for the Faux Pas of the game:
They start playing Rich Boy's "Throw some D's" and I comment how the NBA can play the popular hip hop songs but then blame hip hop for everything that's wrong. G listens to underground hip hop so he doens't know who Rich Boy is. So I say "Well it's really funny because he looks like he has Down Syndrome." Then I quickly remember that there are two kids sitting in the box with us who have Down Syndrome. Add one to the loss column for me.

The "How not to holla" of the day:
I got behind schedule and I ended up driving the mile to the Verizon Center because I knew I could get my gym to validate my parking. Now today is the first time in a long time that I have worn my hair down. I guess I was looking extra fabulous or something (well this is what I'm telling myself). I luck up and get a parking space on the street one block from the arena. I get out the car and this dude is sitting on the hydrant and I think I hear him say "Wow you got lucky." I thought he was talking about my parking space. I turn around and say "Yeah I'm really lucky." He replies "Yeah your man sho' is lucky." Then I snapped out of my parking mojo induced haze and realize he's commenting on me.

I keep walking and start to wonder how efficient his process is. I am very well aware that some men play the numbers game. Talk to as many women as possible hoping one will bite. If you are going to talk to women on the street don't talk to the ones who are walking fast. Based on the law of averages she's in a hurry and not going to stop to speak to you. We are even less likely to speak to the guy sitting on the fire hydrant in front of Fuddruckers. I've said it once and I'll say it again. There are some people who are just not on my level. Give them a shower and a job sure but in thier current state it's not going to happen.

Comment Comment Comment


I want us all to say NO to white tights! After being away from DC for two years I forgot how truly fashioned challenged people are. I see way too many adult women in white tights and stockings. It's really ugly and sad on top of it all. If you are my friend and you own white tights please say goodbye to them or I will have to say goodbye to you. I only hang with fly people. I'm err umm kidding...maybe.



I'm also trying to figure out exactly how this type of pose protects your hair from the rain. Yesterday the rain came a bit earlier than expected and a few people were caught off gaurd. I saw various black women running from the rain in this pose. If I were them I would have caught a cab or walked into the CVS they just passed and got a cheap umbrella. I remember what it was like to make sure your hair stayed on point.



Now what do these things have in common? Usually nothing but at the gym this white blonde woman with bone straight hair was combing her hair with a afropic. It was the oddest things I had seen in a very long time. She didn't have a sign of kink so I wanted to inquire about her choice.

I was talking to this woman and half way through the conversation she zipped up her jacket. That's because I was staring at her boobs. It was unintentional and I felt bad that I mad her uncomfortable. The problem is that this happened several times recently. The thing is that I don't even realize that I'm doing it until they cover themselves. It comes partly from me not liking to make eye contact with people. I try to stare somewhere close to the face so they think I am looking at their face.

I don't want people to mistake me for a lesbian. I don't need that kind of confusion in my life. This all might contradict that fact that I have a crushes on Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johansen but they are "flat chested" so that's different.

I've had my Macbook for 5 days now and I'm extremely happy with the purchase. The Apple online store had them refurbished for $899 or I could have bought a new one for $1199. I looked at another dell and with a warranty they would have run me $1200. I couldn't really see what a PC could offer me besides windows Vista.

What I did was buy a refurbished Macbook with a warranty, 160GB external drive, and a usb hub for $1200. If I bought anything new I would have paid much more for all of it. I couldn't be happier. Now I just have to find a software hook up. Now I am able to have my entire music collection on my hip since I'm not dealing with an overpacked hard drive. It's been a long time coming.

So Mac or PC? I would say Mac there are so many things that are easier. Things aren't buried way deep in a directory you don't know that exist. It's far more intuitive to way I think. There are only a few keyboard shortcuts that are different. It's just beautiful to gaze upon as well.

So the scales have shifted on my undying love for the east coast. People ask me how I deal with the weather and I always reply how snow is very pretty or something to that effect. Well today I realize I deal with the weather because I never reallly have to deal. I've never shoveled snow and until today I never had to deal with major snow removal on a car. Well right now I'm sitting here hoping that my roomate comes home with wine because I need to relax. I spent the last 45 minutes cleaning off two cars. Now I didnt have to do the second one but like a good roomate I cleaned off the car she is taking care of for her friend who is going through chemo. Now this was about 3 solid inches of ice I banged my way through. This wasn't ice scraping this was brute force. It was quite dangerous as massive pieces of ice came crashing down to the ground unexpectedly. I know my wrists will hurt tomorrow the way my shoulders and upper back do right now. In the morning the nex challenge will be getting out of my parking space. Thank God I don't have to park on the street. I hear people out there now struggling to get out.

Fortunately I came in the house and I turned on Itunes and low and behold....my neighbors music is showing up in my itunes. I didn't realize that my wireless connection was on another network. So I just listed to Corrine Bailey Rae and I don't care for her music. I listened to it because I could. I say if you don't want anyone else in your files don't leave them open. Nothing beats the Beastie Boys Paul's Boutique.

Snow Day!

Not! I could stay home but my computer is broken. So I have to go to
work to get my abstract in. If it wasnt for that I would stay right
here and do all my calls from bed. However I think I will leave early
and spend the rest of the day with my other. This would have been a
good cuddle boo day. We have never celebrated vday before. The last
time I celebrated I went on a blindish date with one of the regular
readers of this blog. He gave me a bottle of Reisling. My new Macbook
arrives tomorrow and I can't wait.

It finally happened. I knew this day would come. I never knew how I would handle it. I've dreaded this day but I knew it would happen. He opened his mouth and let it out, his British accent. I finally heard the man speak in his native tongue. It's so not sexy; repulsive even. Stringer Bell will you ever comeback to me?

(blogging on the blackberry is not the move...thus the initial typos)

This weekend I attended a party full of debauchery. I haven’t attended a party with this particular bunch of friends in a minute. So I decided to grace them with my presence. Every one was shocked that I showed up and someone said “It’s official now that you’re here.” Then another person inquired if “my man was around.” He wasn’t but I thought it was hilarious that this was their first statement after saying hello. I got there kind of late, fashionably late I thought, but it seemed that everyone was very intoxicated when I showed up. There were no more mixers really just Bacardi galore so I new I would be impaired shortly. I drank, danced, and entertained myself and those around me. In true fashion when I drink I can’t shut up. Just imagine this combined with having the hiccups. It was terrible even with my chest spasm induced interruptions every 10 seconds, I continued to blab on….and on…and on…..and on. I’m sorry for all of you who endure my blabbering. I'm not embarrasaed about it or anything it's just what I do.

At the end of night, my significant other called and asked me to pick him up from a restaurant because the train had stopped running. He gets in the car and I tell him how much fun I had. Then I exclaim “I didn’t even rub my butt on anyone. You can ask everybody.” I was so proud of myself! I didn’t try not to dance with other people I just never got around to it . I only need myself to have a good time.

The next morning I went to brunch with the roomie at a new place on U Street, Creme. The food was delicious and I can’t be mad at the bottomless mimosas. I highly recommend the brunch. The service wasn’t great but the waiter did everything he could to get the kitchen to get their act together.

The Super Bowl party I went to was decent. I was really tired at that point though and could barely stay awake during the second half. It was a good game and I’m happy for Tony Dungy. The low lights were the three patronizing “We are making Black History (Month)” commercials. The entire audience of about 60 people I viewed the game with were all annoyed with that string of commercials.

Lastly, who names their son Lovie? I hope he’s named after his grandfather or something.

I'm nursing a strange hangover. I woke up fine but after putting
together this ikea chair I feel sick. This is really strange. I cant
be sick on superbowl sunday.

So I might be on a bit of hiatus. I was working long hours for the last week so I had nothing to report. Actually just not a enough time to talk about clogging the toilet and going to home depot at 6:30am. My computer was damaged during a work related event so I won't have much access for at least a month as I work it out with them. It will cost $500 to replace the mother board. So I might not be able to blog that much. I'm working on setting up mobile blogging in the mean time. I guess I will be a "crackberry" addict for a bit.

Here I sit typing away on my blackberry. This is what happens when you
work 14 hour days and during the process your laptop breaks.

Complicit


When you find out your friend is cheating on their mate what do you do? I'm conflicted right now and I rather not know it's happening. I'm not friends with the mate but I do have respect for the person. It's hard for me to sit back and just watch. I really wish the person was smart enough to keep it on the hush ( i can't say DL anymore). Actually I think they tried to but I believe the person they are cheating with needs validation and keeps doing things in front of other people. I plan to do nothing because I already know shit will hit the fan because one of the people in this scenario is crazy...off their rocker. I just wish I wasn't being made to be complicit. When their mate comes to town I have to lie (by omission) like things are all good. I'm surprised that this makes it uncomfortable as it does.

Every woman needs a gay boyfriend

Finally, not that I was looking I found a gay boyfriend. I don't consider myself a fag hag (or fruit fly) in any way. I don't go out searching for them or anything that blatant. When they come into your life it's a blessing. I was lucky enough to spend four days with this wonderful man. He's orginally from DC but now lives in MD. We have the same sense of humor, he loves to dance, and we both love to shop. What more do I need? We are going to see Alvin Ailey next so that should be wonderful! I'm so happy to have met someone I totally clicked with. He's just a cool dude. Now everyone refers to him as my "gay boyfriend". Two boyfriends....I think I can handle that.

Adams Morgan

I haven't been there at night time in a very long time, years I don't think. Yesterday I met up with my friend from UNC and we went to Felix. An extremely cute and smooth latino dude talked with me at the bar and I loved the attention. It was really funny because I was going to find him to dance later because he just had that much "umph". Later on he starts having this thing with this other short light skinned black girl and I was like "the hell". She's stealing "my man (attention) yo"! It was just hilarious my reaction to that situation. My friend even was trying to play wing woman knowing that it was futile. I think if I was "on the prowl" I would have thought he was sleazy. Knowing it wouldn't go anywhere I could soak up thebrief attention.

Now Adams Morgan really isn't my scence and Felix used to be filled with a lot of pretentious trash. As usual in Adams Morgan things have changed. They had four floors two of which were great. One had a great DJ playing good music where I danced my little heart out. Then there was a lounge area with a band that was great. I would return to Felix on a Saturday.

I took this guys number and I thought I gave him mine but I think I got myself out of that one. I really don't recall giving it to him. I told him that I've been in a long term relationship but he insisted. I have no intentions of anything. I haven't figured out how to make platonic male friends in DC. It seems impossible when I'm so used to having them. It's just so weird.

Now I'm sure some of you probably think "B must get sick of you flirting and giving your number out." He really doesn't care because he knows me pretty well. He knows i'm a punk sometimes. So he laughs at me I'm sure the same way you all do when you read these stories.

Right now my face is all sorts of tones, patches, scales and flakes. I’m not sure what is going on. I’m feeling ugly for the first time in my life. A lot of people have self esteem issues and will never feel beautiful on the outside. I usually feel beautiful on the outside but not right now. I basically look like I haven’t washed my face or can’t afford moisturizer or something. So no matter how fly my outfit is, it just doesn’t matter when you have a crusty face. I’m going to the doctor tomorrow so hopefully they will do something about it.

I think my fiercely dry skin is giving a certain class of men a little confidence. My percentage of hollas from the “I wear a fake NorthFace bomber jacket no matter the weather crowd” has increased about 70%. They are probably wearing T-Skirts under them too. I don’t care what people say…I am very out of their league. The normal professional dude hollas have disappeared.

I’m kind of a classist in some respects but I try my hardest to at least be friendly to everyone. Although I pegged him for the purse snatching type, I made the mistake of having a musical discussion with a guy on the train platform the other day. I was just being friendly I thought. I didn’t see that he would try to “get to know me better” by the end of the conversation. . I couldn’t convince him that he didn’t want to know me so I gave him my home phone number. I never answer the phone.

A week passes and I use my home phone to call GEICO to change my insurance. I hung up with them and the phone was still in my hand and it rings again. So I answer it. It’s him. He starts talking to me and I’m like who is this since he never asked to speak to anyone. He said he was looking for Isabel and I told him he had the wrong number. He insisted that he really didn’t know my name but he knew it was me because of the way I talk. I tried damn hard to get him to hang up but I ended up hanging on him. The phone rings over and over but we don’t have caller id so I have to assume it was him. After two hours of calling he finally left a message asking me to call him back.. I wouldn’t have done that anyway but I couldn’t because I don’t have his number.

I need to learn to be firmer but I’ve seen dudes do some terrible things to girls for giving out fake numbers etc. Some men get their egos bruised so easily. This morning I saw and example of what I was supposed to do. I guy tried to talk to a girl when she didn’t respond he tapped her arm. She said “Don’t touch me” in a firm voice and kept it moving. I’ll try that next time.

RIP Momofuku Ando

Creator of Top Ramen and other Nissin instant ramen products dies at 96. For some reason I feel this man is very important and deserves a space in my blog. He shaped my childhood somewhat...it was one of the few bad foods my mother allowed in the house. A lot of us ate it in college. Where would we be without his man? (in better health certainly but...)

Today my one of my best friends called me today. We only talk a couple of times a year but it doesn't matter because we are friends of quality and not quantity. I blatantly sat at my desk and talked to her for 30 mins while my boss kept walking by me handing me stuff. I simply didn't care. We caught up on so much stuff. She's one person who really knows me and even where we differ, she accepts me fully. We usually spend the holidays together and she and her husband are like my second family. She has been there to console me through many wack dudes and the crazy family antics around my mothers death. Even 3000 miles way I know she'll always be there for me. I also forgot that I gave her the link to this blog so she read but she needs to start commenting.

It got me thinking about all the predictions you make about your future lives. We predicted who would get married first:

College Predictions: Aisha, Sher, Jen
Results: Sher, Jen, ....Aisha's still waiting

High School Predictions: Aisha, Lisa, Quynh, Michelle
Results: Lisa, Quynh,...Michelle would be married if it wasn't for superstitous in-laws, Aisha's still waiting.

It's funny what you think will happen but life has other plans for you. We always sit around (drinking) laughing at these predictions. I was at the top of everyone's list because I dated more than anymore else. I guess I just love trail and error. For a little while (like 24hrs) I was stressing being last but really, I enjoy my life so what does it matter? I think women are socialized to have this artificial sort of competiton. It's reallys stupid and pointless.

This is an interesting case....i could have sent a few people to jail. Please comment.

http://www.wilsonappeal.com/index.php

Happy New Year

I'm really tired right now because I just devoured a meal of ribs, grilled octopus, black eyed peas, greens, roasted potatoes and champagne. I passed on the quail, pig feet, vegetable medley and cornbread. I think I may pass out but not before I taste the rice pudding.

Last wee I was nearly ready to break up with my significant other because I thought he hadn't gotten me anything for Christmas. I don't give to get but come on! I came back from vacation and he made me creme brulee with the gift I gave him. So I'm just waiting for him to bless me with my gift. He hands me a book "101 Things to do with a Tortilla." Cute huh? But really umm I was still looking for my gift. Then he lets me know that he hadn't got me a gift. I was about to get a lil beligerent until he said it was because he didn't know what color to get.

Now I present to you the piece de resistance:

A five quart KitchenAid Artisan Stand Mixer. As you can see I want Chrome. It also comes with a icecream maker attachment. I will be in full effect from now on. This doesn't bode well for my diet plans though.

I was trying to post something while I was in Atlanta but it was hate filled. So it was in my best interest that it didn't post. Let's just say that I was thrown a big curve ball for Christmas vacation. I was unexpectedly stuck in the suburbs and that sucks.

Chicago




I'm sure some of you were wondering where I've been. I've been in the lovely city of Chicago for a week. I've been to Chicago a couple of times and each time I fall more and more in love with the city. I could live there if it wasn't for the weather. It's just a great town with enough hustle and bustle and great local culture. There is delcious food and shopping just waiting around every corner. The city does have it's chain stores but there are many local spots to find that unique thing that you have been waiting for. Here are some reviews of what the city has to offer.

Yoshi's
Tuesday night we headed out to the Lakeview area for dinner. Out of our list of reccomendations we decided on Yoshi's. Given the name you would think it was an Asian place however, it serves "contemporary American" cuisine. I started off with a tuna tartare appetizer. On my plate I found a generous mound of tuna sitting a top a large dollop of guacamole with freshly fried tortilla strips on the side. The dish also included an oyster shooter flavored with jalapeno. The oyster shooter was orgasmic so I asked for another. For my entree I had the spaghetnni with shirmp and scallops. I was nearly full from the appetizer but I ate every last bite of my pasta. Yoshi's is a must eat if you like great interesting food. Entrees will run about $20-$25 dollars but it was well worth it. Also Tuesday is half price martini night.

Frontera Grill
Chef Rick Bayless is midly famous as celebrity chefs go. He is rarely on the food network but had a show on PBS. He is known as the best chef that does Mexican cuisine. I shared appetizers with the group to sample more of the food at Frontera. The ceviche was very fresh as the squid was very tender without a hint of chewiness. The guacomole was just okay and with it's high price it should have been much better. My entree of carne asada came out cold but I excused that because we ordered around the time the fire department and the EMTS showed up. They brought a delerious looking employee who may have been burned. The second plate of carne asada was much better than the first one. The meat was actually medium this time and the black beans and plantains were very flavor full. I didn't think the food lived up to the hype. I've had better Mexican many other times from less expensive places.

Wait Wait Don't Tell Me

For some intellectual stimulation, go see a taping of NPR's Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. It's a very funny weekly news quiz they record every Thursday at the Chase Auditorium downtown. They have celebrity comedians every week who participate in the news quiz and they are hilarious and very politically incorrect. This week they had the very funnyMo Rocca who often does commentary for VH1's I Love the...(70s, 80s, 90's). I'm sure 90% of my taping was edited because they were so raunchy. It was very very fun.

Funky Buddah

Funky Buddha known as "The Buddah" to insiders is always a very fun club. People in Chicago dance their asses off. They don't care they just have fun. The Buddah plays a mix of hip hop, rnb, chicago house, oldies, rock. You name it they just might play it. A very mixed crowd comes to The Buddah and there isn't a hint of pretention. Be sure to shake your body when you are in town. Friday and Sunday nights are the reccomened nights for this place.

Be Thankful For Each Day


A friend of mine just lost a family member. His cousin died in a freak explosion. Actually, I few of you that read this blog have met my friend and some of you are friends with him.


I'm not as spirtual as I would like to be but I am indeed thankful for all that I do have. It is really weird how you could visit your cousin one day, fly home and then the next day he dies. That is what happened to my friend. I try to live one day at a time but if there is something I want to do before I die, I better put that on the schedule. You just never know. God bless his life.

So little time

Work is really busy these days. When I first start working there I took the time each day to read dcist.com and several of my favorite blogs. Then I thought I should start writing again and this is what we have here. Now my time to read blogs and write my own has vanished. When I come home from work I don't want to be the nerd who pulls out their computer to blog as soon as I get home. So now I have a dilemma.

Also DC Adventures isn't what it used to be. Much of the drama and funny stories came from dating and being new to my surroundings. Now I'm in a less exciting relationship (intercultural dating makes for great stories) and I pretty much know my way around DC. So what adventures could I possibly have? I really don't want to bore you all with stories of "How not to holla 101." I don't really know what I am going to do. I guess you have to just wait and see.

What if?





Since I've become a boring lame ass, I spend my friday nights curled up with netflix eventhough there are clubs just a few blocks from my door. Last night I watched Akeelah and the Bee. The movie is simplistic but it is extremely heartwarming. The ficitional character is from the neighborhood I'm from. I could identify it all just by the way the house looked. In fact, almost every Los Angeles hood film is filmed where I grew up. Safe enough for a film crew but still south central Los Angeles. I consider myself blessed in many ways because my life could have been just like Akeelah's. The only difference was that I had two parents, although divoriced who made sure I did my best. I did however, have a sister who was like Akeelah's brother and no matter what my parents did she was on her own thing. She always bought into the peer pressure to be the cool kid. So even with the same rearing you can have vastly different outcomes.

What if my father didn't come around after the divorice?
What if my mother didn't care?
What if they didn't get me into better schools?


I might have been that akward kid in an environment where my peers shunned learning. I'm so glad that wasn't the case. I really appreciated that this move took the time to show how hard to succeed when everything is against you. People are lying to themselves if they think it's a level playing field out there.

Brainfood

Every Thursday at 3:55 I leave the office early for the highlight of my week. I volunteer with a program for high school kids that teaches them life skills through cooking. They are not only learning how to measure and chop; they also learn to share, make decisions, organize and to lead.

Although my day job helps children, I never see the kids we help. In fact I don't want to see them. Having to deal with kids everyday is not for me. However, once a week for two hours that I can do. All the kids are really sweet and not assholes in the way I think of DC teenagers. They still try to show bravado but at the end of the day they all love coming to class. Attendance is dropping now but going there two days a week can be a big commitment.

It's so fulfilling for me and I hope the kids are getting something out of it. They learn to try new things every week and none of them know how to cook. So far we've covered baking with Sweet Potato Biscuits as the highlight. This week they just started using knifes and the collard greens were pretty good. All the kids are inner city youth of color so I'm glad to be doing my part. I think it's good for them to see that I've moved across the country and that I went to college because many of them may not. So hopefully they like me and I'm a role model for them. So if you have just a little bit of time in your day please find a way to give back to others.

Adventures in bra-lessness.

The day started out great. I went to the gym at 7:30 AM and did 45 minutes on the elliptical. I'm really trying to lose weight and I am committed to that.

When I finished showering I reached outside of the stall for my towels and they were not hanging on the hook. I looked down and noticed a towel on the floor. I screeched "who took my other towel?" I really didn't want to put on a towel that had been on the floor but I had to. My wet hair was dripping everywhere and I needed my second towel. I got out the shower rounded the corner and I see a black girl standing on a towel. I could see the guilty look on her face. I'm pretty sure she took my towel. But you know we don't need people making public false accusations now do we?

I calmed myself down and tried to remember that it's just a small thing. I was annoyed at the inconvenience. I ended up putting on my hoodie and sweatpants and running out and getting another towel. I started to get dressed and realize I didn't put a bra in my bag. There is no way in the world that Aisha should be walking around without a bra. I'm mad uncomfortable but I need to get to work for a meeting at 9AM. Soon as I walk out the gym the sexual harassment starts. There was no way to hide the bounce even with my hoodie on. In a 5 block walk I got holla'ed at 4 times. This includes the cab driver who pulled over and rolled his window down to talk to me.

I get to work and have my meeting but everyone kept asking me what was wrong. They could see on my face that I was uncomfortable. When I had a break, I ran across the street to Macy's to find a bra. I'm lucky that it was that easy to remedy the problem. I find a sale bra in my size. I approach the counter and the cashier says, "I can't remember if it's still tax free day. Let me call security." I was puzzled as to why she would call security. Security didn't know and they wouldn't even tell her to whom she was speaking. Then she saw some stockboys and tried to get their attention and they wouldn't talk to her. She laments in her best urrea accent, "I don't know why they couldn't just say they didn't know. Why did they have to ignore me? If I was a white man they would have answered. But that's okay because Jesus still loves them and so do I." I stood there thinking that this is what it would be like if my "Ghetto Sister" had a job in retail.

The cashier calls around to other departments but no one answers. At this point at least 5 minutes have passed and I'm getting rather impatient. I just wanted to say just charge me tax "I don't care I'm only going to save 99 cents." The only reason I didn't do it was because I wasn't feeling that confident without a bra on. Finally she calls the "big boss" to find out about tax free week. He confirms that there is no tax. I pay my $9.99 and start to hurry off since people at work have no idea where I went. The cashier tells me to wait because she wants to give me some coupons for my patience. She gives me four 20% off coupons and it's tax free week...holla.


The last subject for today. I think I changed ethnicities again. In the past two weeks I've been asked many times if I was Ethiopian or people have just walked up to me speaking Ahmaric. This includes a toothless, afroed, trench coat wearing, homeless looking man who I swear was going to steal me or my purse. I was trying to tell him I was not Habesha but I couldn't find the words because I was scared. This was part of the reason the cab driver tried to hunt me down this morning. He thought I was one of his country women. I'm not sure why I go through varying states of exoticism. It's made for an interesting time on the east coast.

Lynchburg, VA




The town was nothing like I thought it would be. I imagined farm land for miles and people sitting on their porches with shot guns. However that wasn't the case. As we approached the city we got a lovely view of the city of seven hills. The city looks a lot like Providence, RI. If no one told you, you might think that you were in New England. The city has very historic architecture and is not a bunch of sub-divisions and strip malls like many cities in the south. I could clearly imagine Civil War battles happening in this town. I could also still see remnants of segregation as I passed by what was once Paul Lawrence Dunbar High School for Coloreds.

It's not a hick town at all. They have two colleges, malls, farmers markets and even a Gold's Gym. They have sidewalks everywhere while Chapel Hill, Raleigh, and Durham aren't even paved everywhere.I don't think they have much night life though. It doesn't really matter because families are close and you just hang out with your people drinking cocktails.

The only strange thing that happened was that I was offered a meal of chitlins, greens, rolls, and champagne! I politely declined.

Food Blog?

Since leaving Carolina, I’ve spent a lot more time cooking and making love to my cookbooks. Right before leaving Carolina, I was really into Weight Watchers “Meals in Minutes”. I wasn’t using it for diet purposes at all; it really has some very good quick meals you can make in 15, 20, and 30 minutes.

The problem with my cooking and baking is that I hate to experiment. It’s really my fear of failure or more like “ewww cousin Aisha can’t cook for shit” fear. I’m always in search of the “Best Recipe”. I want other people to perfect it and then I’ll make it. I might experiment with basic things like pasta but other than that I won’t try. So in some ways that makes me not a cook but a recipe follower. So this year I’m trying to branch out.

Over the summer someone asked me to make some banana chocolate chip mini pound cakes. It was so hard for me to make anything other than plain or chocolate cappuccino. I had to figure out on my own how to flavor them. They came out great and people at Drew’s Cookout really liked them. Another thing I did differently were my Magic Bars, at Game Night. I made them with chocolate, butterscotch and coconut. They were sinfully sweet and got rave reviews. In general I’ll take bigger risks when baking because sweet is sweet in some respects. However savory stuff, I’m not so confident.

The chili I made the other day actually came out great despite me botching the measurements. It was also a patient dish, 4 hours in the making and I couldn’t be more proud of the outcome. It’s always good when something taste like it was made with warmth….hot chili peppers too.

Chicken Noodle Soup

Chicken noodle soup, chicken nooddle soup, chicken noodle soup with an apple juice on the side. Let rain....clear it out. I saw a little girl perform this on the metro yesterday. Well not apple juice but that's been my main meal for the past few days. I'd also like my respritory system to let it rain and clear it out. Maybe that little chick was more profound than I thought.

On Wednesday I was sitting around and realized that I ran out of soup. Then I got to thinking who would bring me soup when i'm sick. I knew of three people who would bring me soup but none of them were available. I started to think about who were my friends and who would bring me soup. That's the true friend who will bring your soup. So in DC I wasn't really sure who I could call to bring me soup outside of those three people.

So then there is the reverse. To whom would you bring soup?

A Day of Mishaps

I woke up this morning feeling a lot better. I didn't have the urge to cough immediately and I think I inhaled through my nose. In fact I was hungry....I must have been feeling better. I checked email and decided that I would run to WholePayCheck to get some things so that I could make chili. I also felt the urge to set up my workstation so that this overheated Dell laptop can stop burning my naked thighs. I had tons of energy.

I put everything together and typed out my grocery list to test out the print. I press print and the printer doesn't show up as an option. My first instinct is to find the install disk. Oddly I know exactly where it is. I put it in and it tells me the printer is already installed. I decide to reboot. I try to install it again and starts to install and then tells me I need to reboot. I press Ok and it then tells me I can't reboot while it is trying to install. I shut it down and decided I would try to uninstall it. It tells me that there is nothing installed but there are some useless files still installed. So I uninstall those and then try to reinstall. I finally get it to work.

I'm ready to print out the grocery list and I press print once again. It prints but there is nothing on the page. I now remember that I had expended all my ink on my thesis. So being the smart girl I am I change the text to red so I can just use the color cartridge. It prints but now it's only showing 1/3 of the things on the list. I dig around and I find another color cartridge and now my grocery list is complete printed in blue letter.

Going to WholePayCheck is fun for me. They usually have everything that I need especially some of the more exotic things. I really need some Yogi Tea to deal with this cold otherwise I might have gone to Giant. Also I love the bulk spice section. You scoop your own spices they cost about 80 cents/oz. compared to the $3 or so you pay for a jar of the same spice. It really helps when you are buying an exotic spice you don't need a whole lot of. I got everything and went to the meat counter to buy beef shoulder. I didn't see any beef shoulder and asked the girl behind the counter for it and she told me it was prepackaged. I went over there and didn't see anything labeled shoulder. So I just picked up some brisket since I know I like brisket.

I get home and look up beef shoulder and find out that's the same as chuck roast. Chuck Roast is way cheaper thank brisket. Due to my lack of knowlegde....I spent more than I needed too at Wholepaycheck. Also chuck roast is better for stewing and I should have thought of that considering I am making chili.

After viewing the recipe in the morning I decided that I would half it since I really didn't need 12 servings. I cut up the beef and the spices and I made my own chili powder. I start putting together the wonderful creation together. It smells really good and then I realize that I halved everything except the spices.

I run over to my computer to google some suggestion on how to work on this mishap. My first instinct is to just add water but I'm trying to concentrate the flavor so that probably won't work. I try to google and the page won't come up. I try other pages they dont' work either. So I check my wireless connection no IP address. I walk over to the modem no cable. I cut on the TV no cable!

Comcast actually cut off the cable! My roommate got into a fight with Comcast over the weekend because they wouldn't send anyone out to fix our fuzzy cable. Most channels were so fuzzy we couldn't see them anyway plus I thought we were just going to be without TV not internet too. Actually, when we moved in the cable was on so I didn't really think they were going to cut it off. Since they wouldn't fix it I thought they would be too lazy to cut it off. I'm at home sick....I need me some internet. So I’m writing this right now in the hopes that I can jack someone’s internet. Did I tell you I need my internet?

I was already planning to go to work tomorrow but now I have more incentive to. I found out my new Blackberry arrived today. It functions as a modem. I have the significant other hook up so I pay very little for unlimited internet.

Hopefully I will have a better day tomorrow.

It's that time of the year

The time of the year when Aisha gets bronchitis. It starts with a sore throat and a little congestion. Now I am at the full fledged mucus filled coughing stage. This sucks and there isn't anything a doctor can do about it. I cough about every 30 seconds all day long which irritates my throat even more and my chest and ribs get sore. I have to settle for broth and water only.

I'm trying to figure out how to play this with work. My boss is a pediatric nurse practitioner so she understands this very well. However, I took three days off last week and now I'm about to take 3 more at least. My bouts with bronchitis usually last about 3 weeks. So I plan to do conference calls from home. I think I am going to go in today and grab some work to do. I don't really care about work that much but I care about my paycheck. I zapped my savings over the summer when I was unemployed.

So as you enjoy your delicious meals for today be thankful as I eat yet another can of progresso soup.

As a result of my last post someone went on a little stalking session for me. She found out that he is in New Jersey and he's married. So I guess he got that green card after all? Of course the girl is Indian. Okay let me log off of his wedding website. I think that's closure for me!

The other things is that our information is not safe. My friend only knew his first and last name and she was able to find way too much personal information about him. I felt bad that she was able to intrude into his life like that. Then I googled him just to see and before I never found anything. Recently he must of added himself to a "social networking" site and I found his resume and websites that link to the rest of his life. I think we all need to be more careful about what information we put up on mypsce and other places. Seriously I really wanted to know that he was okay. I found out way more than I wanted.

I just realized something else. This is yet another one who got married after dating me. Since I was 19, I have a 100% record. If you are in a relationship with me and it ends, you will get married to your next girlfriend. I'm not sure what tht says about me. I'm sure here must be someway I can make money from this, lol.

Edit:

I read my horoscope like once a week but I really don't believe in them. However, this one is very ironic:

It's time to free yourself of old expectations and stale situations that are more trouble than they're worth. Letting go of the past can be difficult, but it's one of the most rewarding tasks you can take on.

I think they are right considering today's events. Free!

Back Down Memory Lane

I went to Boston for a conference and it was great to be back in the city. I was finally reminded of why I fell in love with the city. The city is so beautiful. The history is in the archetecture is amazing.

So last night I had walk through the Christian Science Complex. My ex boyfriend used to work there. He may still work there but he cut off contact with me for very good reason. We had a high recidivism rate. As I walked through the complex I stopped at the reflecting pool. I reflected on how so much of Boston is enveloped in that relationship. A relationship that I don't know why I cannot get over. Just when I think I've forgotten about him something reminds of him.

As I stared into the pool I wasn't thinking about our memories. I was thinking about how much I would love to see him. But why? I guess I didn't really get the closure and I can't let it go. It's all absurd because as most of you know....I was calling to break up with him when he did it first. So what's my issue? That was three years ago why can't I just let it go?

Sexual Harrasment count today:

3 Honkers
7 Craned Necks

Total: 10

Race rears it's head

I didn't want to say "ugly" necessarily. This weekend I took a risk and invited friends from all my circles to a party at my house. I knew it was risky given that most of my friends really speak their minds but have differing backgrounds. Also, I didn't know how my roommates friends would mix in with my friends. Fortunately, only two white people showed up and that was enough. Unfortunately, the white girl in the room stopped by on her way to a costume party. However, none of us knew what her costume was about. Simply, she was wearing a black blazer and no shirt or bra under it and a short skirt with thigh-high stockings. Somehow the party was briefly segregated and all the Black people were in the kitchen whispering about her outfit. Then someone inquired, "What are you, a whore?"

It turns out she was Jessica Cutler . There was no indication and the Washingtonienne scandal happened years ago. Ms. Cutler is no longer water cooler talk. My roommate gave her a copy of the book to carry around so at least she could explain herself.

Then the conversation turned to our other friend who recently moved in with two white men. There was so much discussion of what it was like. I'm sure we all would have been offended if a white person was inquiring about what it is like to live with a black person. I recognize there are differences because I have lived with everyone under the rainbow. However, the same convo different people...disaster.

"What the fuck? Are we not human? What do you mean what's it like? Fuck you whitey white racist ass cracka."

After about an hour the white people left and no more showed up. At first I was wondering why none of my white friends showed up but that's okay. I didn't think about Halloween parties and Hampton's Homecoming when I picked the date. It was for the best though. Race relations haven't come as far as I think they have. When people are trying to let loose who wants to worry about racial offenses? Who wants to explain spades? Who wants to explain why they are slamming the dominos on the table?

She found my diploma!

For the second time, there has been a mishap with my diploma. This time there is at least a funny story to go with it. I get a message on Myspace today saying.

"Hey Aisha did you ever get your diploma? I met this guy on match.com and I mentioned to him that I recently got my MPH. He tells me that he got girls diploma named Aisha M. and she also has an MPH. Might it really be yours?"

Why yes it probably is! So she is going to let him know that indeed I never got my diploma from UNC.

As for Berkeley apparently I really didn't need it. I managed to work for four years before I figured out that I didn't officially graduate. It wasn't until I applied to graduate school that I found this out.

Washington Sports Club

...here I come! Now that my new home is nearly in order, I feel that I can make a return to my workouts. I don't want to waste that $60 that comes out of my account every month. I've decided that I will come into work thirty minutes earlier so that I can take a longer lunch to go to the gym. Since I'm walking to and from work right now, I don't want to leave downtown too late with the impending time change. I estimate I will walk about 15 miles a week just going to and from work. Therefore I can just work on flexibility and muscle strength at the gym during the week. On the weekend I can take one dance class and I should be fine. I talk about my weight a lot because I'm unhappy with it. Hopefully writing about it will keep me more accountable.

I was also inspired to cook this weekend. I managed to make a sesame crusted seared tuna Asian salad, salty oatmeal cookies, and foccacia. The foccacia was disappointing because the yeast was old so it didn't rise. So it became pizza instead. It still had an excellent flavor.

You never get over the death of a parent

On July 12, 2003 my mother died of cancer. It is the event that has shaped my life. Not only her actual death but, her 20 years fight with breast cancer. Every now and then something reminds me of my loss. Something that makes me upset that she's not here with me. I do have to remember how fortunate I am. I could have lost her when I was three and barely have any memory of her. So I am happy that I even have something to remember.

As I continue to unpack I find things I haven't seen in a very long time. This morning I found the book for "Little Miss Los Angeles 1983". As a child my father put me in many pageants. In the booklet people bought advertisements to support me and offer encouraging words. On my three pages are the names of friends and family many of which who are no longer with us. These include my mother, aunt, grandmother, god mother.

The book also shows how much life has changed. Al King, our family mechanic bought an ad. He is now the partner of my cousin Attricia. Also both of my parents Post Office buddies bought ad and now my dad is retired. Another thing I noted is that businesses from Compton, CA bought ads in my book. I may not actually be from Compton but Compton is for Aisha!

It's time to update the book a little bit: We Love and Miss You Mommy-Gina, Trice & Aisha

Stripping vs. Prostitution

I was thinking hard today as to whether I want this blog to be focus or unfocused. I decided that each entry should be focused on something. So I think I 'll keep it to one topic with maybe a mention of a Daily Random Happening.

"Why did she quit stripping to go in to prostitution? Stripping pays a lot more and is safer."

I overhead someone say this the other day. Does stripping pay more than prostitution? Is stripping safer? I think stripping is seen as a more noble profession than prostitution. But does it really pay more? Personally I don't think so. When you get up to strip there is no guarantee that you will ever get tipped. No one has to give you money but if you work it out a little bit you may get a few dollars in your g-string. With prostitution you get to negotiate up front the cost of doing business but, you must attract business first.

Now let's make a few other observations:

Stripping vs. Prostitution

you get to take breaks between each set vs. walking the hoe stroll all night
you're less likely to split money with a pimp vs. more likely to be split money w/a pimp
you collect money in small amounts vs. you get larger lump sums per client
you get "loyal customers" vs. you too get "loyal customers"

I don't really see the benefit to prostitution unless you are a "call girl". Which one is safer? I can't call it.

I have contemplated stripping...just to do it once (or thrice). I mean public stripping, not stripping for my significant other. I was once almost coerced to jump on the stage at amateur night. I didn't do it because people I knew would be watching me. I really think I could do this if I was in a town where no one knew me. I think that ship has sailed though.

I'd like to hear your own stripping vs. prostitution comparisons.

Daily Random Happening: I was eating my morning oatmeal and my pasty white neighbor of mine was making his bed in his underwear. I can easily see into the second and third floors of the houses across the street. I thought I had an advantage having the bigger room with all the light but I have to keep my blinds closed.

We are back!

Rather I should say "I'm Back". I've been inspired to blog again. I just didn't have the time for a Carolina Adventures. Besides, Carolina just wasn't exciting enough. The strangest things have happened since I've been back in DC so I think they deserve my written time.

Since I've been back in DC for about 4 months, I've noticed that I get harrassed/holla'ed at/ogled way more than I ever did before. Yesterday I was involved in an "ogle" gone wrong. I was in the middle of my daily walk from the office. I'm feeling real Ally McBeal these days except I don't dance around in the snow...not yet. I was waiting for the light and I notice someone trying to get my attention. However, he was backing up his Lincoln Towncar while doing this. Unfortunately, he backed into an ethiopian woman. She jumped out of the way to escape bodily injury. He is not aware and continues to back into the crosswalk. So she starts yelling and he doesn't realize she is trying to get his attention. I began pointing so he will notice her. Of course he thinks I'm trying to send him the "yeah i wanna holla at you too boo" signal. Finally, the woman starts banging on his window. All I could do was laugh.

This is the third time someone has caused bodily harm to themselves or someone else in an attempt to get my attention. I'm like my own little public health problem. Aisha Moore the 250th cause of unintentional injuries in the U.S.

That leads me into my next topic "It's All Relative"

I think I need to lose weight and I'm actually doing something about it. I'm the biggest I've ever been and it's not cute to me. The men of DC seem to disagree. So I often wonder what catches their fancy. Everyday I walk downtown and I see stomachs hanging out and pants about to burst. Then I see rather large woman who have learned how to dress appropriately despite the fact that they are a size 22. So in the grand scheme of things I'm on the larger side of small. But if you compare me to the vast majority of woman going to and from PG county on the green line, I'm a drawf. So I suppose on the DC/PG Black Woman scale I'm relatively small?


(note this is my first blog in 2 years. so dont' get confused that the older postings are from october...but 2004)

I haven't posted in almost two months. It's because I don't really care anymore. So here is an non proofread rundown.

I just wanted to say that I saw my first chipmunk today. I've never seen one in my life. I tell you it was so adorable.

School is hectic and I haven't seen a dime of loan money.

John Legend is coming.

Halloween is coming.

DC is coming

Thanksgiving is coming.

Christmas is coming.